How come that in 100 out of 100 sex scandals, the persons who are invariably blamed for the crimes are men and never ever the women who are also involved? Is it that because women are usually perceived as passive in the sex act, they are not considered culpable in sex adventures no matter the role they play in certain specific cases deemed to be scandalous?
In the recent case between Luis Rabiales, former President of the Spanish Football Federation and Jennifer Hermoso, a member of the FIFA winning Spanish national female football team, it is clear to me that if a sexual crime was committed, there is no way that Miss Hermoso cannot be said to be complicit in the crime supposedly said to be committed against her.
In the footage of the controversial kiss which the whole world saw, Rabiales held Hermoso firmly at the back of her head and planted that kiss. Hermoso knew or sensed what Rabiales was about to do. She did not politely or violently resist Rabiales’ firm grip. She knew what Rabiales was set to do and allowed him to do it to her and when he did it and released her, there was no sense of horror or outrage on her part. It is clear that she savored the pleasure of that kiss.
Where, then, lays the problem that Rabiales has been compelled to resign his office? Rabiales has been saying consistently that the kiss was consensual and approved. No one is asking him to provide evidence for his assertion. In the eyes of the hypocritical Western world, a woman can not be guilty whatsoever in any sex scandal. They are beautiful, adorable, innocent and guiltless party when men exhibit their beastly nature by assaulting women. This is the narrative that we are made to hear any time rape or rape-related cases break. The man is guilty and the woman is innocent. Simple.
Why were members of the Spanish female football team protesting about? That it was Jennifer that was given the preferential treatment by being kissed and not them? Did their protest arise from envy or from principle? If it is principle about the need to respect the dignity of women, where does the argument lie now that the so-called ‘’victim’’ did not mind her violation and took active and unrestrained part in that so-called act of indignity against women? The wily ways of women are past finding out.
Why is Hermoso not as condemned as Rabiales over the ‘’rape kiss’’? Can a normal man just decide to rape kiss any woman among a group of women if there had not been prior agreement through her furtive glances, encouraging smiles and other consenting actions? No, there were things going on between Rabiales and Hernoso before the incidence of that day that is why Hermoso did not object to her being kissed. If the initial storm of protest over this affair had come from Hermoso, that she has been abused or violated, this piece would not have been written. Her action later was an afterthought. There is furore now and Hermoso’s victimhood is firmly established simply because she is a woman and cannot be held culpable when a consensual sex act is perceived to be wrong.
The question I keep asking is: does God have a different set of sexual rules for women and a different one for men? It can never be. When women actively play a role in taking over another woman’s husband, the world does not see it as something wrong. But when a man with the active initiationof a woman falls, all hell is broken loose. The world is so hypocritical and I know not why.
The only woman victim of a sexual scandal who seems to have possessed the right perspective on the issue is the wife of the late Greek Prime Minister, Andreas Papandreou. When in the early 90s and as Prime Minister, Papandreou flew an Athenian Airline flight from Greece to South Korea and beheld delectable air hostess, Dimitra Liani, his heart jumped as he felt that he had ‘’met the love of his life’’. Papandreou took to Miss Liani and ditched Margaret, his American wife of then 30 years, who had bored him all his children.
When Mr. Papandreou used to fly to world capitals to attend summits of world leaders, Margaret would take her own flight and lodge in a nearby hotel to her husband’s, to address world press conferences drawing attention to the injustice visited on her by Mr. Papandreou. In the course of her advocacy, she used to ask one pertinent question namely, ‘’where is the sisterhood?’’
In most sex scandals, the persons that are deeply hurt are not the ladies directly ‘’violated’’ by the men but the legitimate wives, concubines, girl friends and other close affiliates of the men who are badly humiliated by reports of the affairs. Why do women and girls not remember the issue of solidarity or sisterhood with fellow women all over the earth by refraining from having flings with men who are not their legitimate partners and in the process, faking violation in order to boost their own popularity or sense of sell-fulfilment?
