In many homes across northern Nigeria, a grandmother’s words often carry more weight than arguments, warnings or even village meetings does. In many instances she is the keeper of family traditions, the peacemaker during disputes and the voice younger generations rarely ignore.
Presently, in Rigafada community of Kano State, that influence is being harnessed for a different purpose, such influence of grandmothers is now being channelled to ending verbal abuse against women and ensuring that more girls remain in school.
A visit to Rigafada community revealed a gathering under the shade of a community meeting point, where about 40 grandmothers shared stories of marriages they had watched flourish and others they had seen crumble under the weight of constant insults, humiliation and neglect. Their conclusion was unanimous: change must begin at home, and they have a role to play in ensuring that change.
It was revealed that the women pledged to use their respected positions within their different families to discourage verbal abuse, counsel young couples and persuade parents, especially fathers: to support their daughters’ education.
Interestingly, the meeting formed part of the Grannies Network for Change (G-NEC) project, an initiative of the Development Research and Projects Centre (dRPC) in collaboration with the Ford Foundation.
Ironically, unlike many campaigns that target only parents or community leaders, the project focuses on grandmothers, recognising them as powerful agents of change in multigenerational households where their advice often shapes important family decisions for their social status in the family attracts a huge power couples with a binding responsibilities.
For 72-year-old Hajiya Mairo Muhammad of Unguwar Yamma, the responsibility extends beyond resolving family disagreements. She
believes raising girls with strong moral values, patience and respect helps build peaceful homes while reducing conflicts that often escalate into abuse.
“We must continue guiding our children and grandchildren, this is something that we must do. Families become stronger when there is mutual respect for each other,” she said.
Another participant, Rakiya Gambo Muhammad, 58, believes educating girls is one of the most effective ways to transform communities.
According to her, every educated girl represents hope for a healthier family, a stronger economy and a more informed society.
She urged parents and caregivers not to deny girls the opportunity to complete their education, stressing that investment in a girl’s future benefits generations. She explained that though they themselves didn’t have the privilege of going to school, but she said they have seen what good food to school does to a family.
It was however gathered that the grandmothers’ resolve comes against the backdrop of persistent challenges in parts of northern Nigeria, where early marriage, school dropout, low enrolment of adolescent girls and different forms of gender-based violence continue to affect thousands of families.
Similarly, according to dRPC, the G-NEC project is being implemented in six communities in Kano State and four in Jigawa State and these communities were selected because they record high levels of violence against wives, early marriage, school dropout and low secondary school enrolment among girls aged 12 to 17.
Moreover, through community dialogue, media engagement and the influence of respected elderly women, the initiative seeks to reduce verbal abuse in homes, encourage healthier relationships between couples and improve girls’ enrolment, attendance and retention in school.
It was also gathered that beyond changing behaviour, the project also aims to generate evidence that community-led interventions rooted in culture and driven by trusted local voices can offer sustainable solutions to gender-based violence.
However, as the meeting ended, the grandmothers dispersed quietly to their homes. But they left with a shared mission, which is,
protecting girls does not always require loud campaigns or sweeping policies and aggressive approaches but a fact that sometimes, it begins with a conversation in the family courtyard, a word of wisdom to a young couple or a gentle reminder that every girl deserves both dignity, respect and an education.
In communities where grandmothers are among the most respected voices, those conversations may prove powerful enough to change lives, even if it is one family at a time.
