Known for their rich cultural heritage, the Itsekiri present one of the most glamourous traditional marriages one could ever witness.
For the bride’s mother, it is an opportunity to pull all stops to ensure that her daughter is given out in the most glamorous fashion.
The bride is expected to make three appearances during the ceremony, decked out in glamorous traditional attires and an assortment of accessories – silver, gold and corals.
It is a well-known fact that elegance becomes the Itsekiri woman. This is a necessary rite that every daughter is expected to perform.
Temisan Boje, a mother of four, spoke to 21st CENTURY CHRONICLE about her marriage 12 years ago. She said, “I wore a full set of coral beads on my head and shoulders. We only wear George wrapper with no top hence the idea of bedazzling yourself with a top like beaded dress.”
It is important to note that amongst the Itsekiris, two wrappers (george of different types) remain the dress code for brides while the men also come decked in wrapper and top known as ikemeje. The look is finished with a hat, a fedora or sexton.
Boje said her husband came with his elders and formally requested for her hand in marriage whilst she stayed hidden in a room.
As it is the custom, there is usually a bit of drama around this activity. And so, her husband was asked to pay homage to her family and the head of her family spoke to the head of her husband’s family.
Boje further said that the eldest person from her husband’s family led the discussions for the negotiation of the bride price and when they had reached an agreement, the dowry was paid and then she was asked to come out and meet her husband. 21st CENTURY CHRONICLE asked Boje how she knew what was going on from her hiding place, and she gave a loud laugh and said, “a good birdie told me’’. Her husband told her all that went on while she was still in hiding, when she came out.
Another Itsekiri bride, Caroline Daniel, said after the formal handover, she became her husband’s wife.
At this point, it dawned on her that she was now a woman.
For her, it was mixed feelings. Anyway, she said , she was too much in the mood for the ceremony to give serious thought to what responsibilities lay ahead of her. She said she enjoyed the dancing, the food and drinks at her marriage. She was fully aware so as to enjoy herself.
Daniel said she also enjoyed the fashion, as she changed into different attires at different times.
“At a point, my husband and I had to wear matching outfits. We both wore George wrappers and tops made from matching fabrics and while he completed his outfit with a hat, I wore a beautifully wrapped headgear called ‘gele’.
Continuing, she explained that at this point, the bride has a choice whether to wear jewelry or not and she did not because she was pregnant and it made her uncomfortable.
Daniel, said after all the celebrations and partying, she was escorted to her husband’s house with her belongings: tams, pots, clothes, all symbolic things indicating she was now a wife.
“One thing I won’t forget is that my younger sister accompanied me so it helped me to ease into my new status in the ‘strange’ new home.”
It is interesting to note that the Itsekiris remain one of the few tribes whose bride price does not cost an arm and a leg, even as glamorous as their marriages remain.
21st Century Chronicle learnt that till date, the bride price still remains one bottle of gin and 12 shillings. The 12 shillings now is approximated to N120.00 in our current currency.
This tradition has been upheld through the years because they believe that giving out a child in marriage does not amount to selling that child.
Dr Edmond George, a resident of Warri, Delta State, while speaking to 21st CENTURY CHRONICLE via a phone interview, explained that the reason the body of an Itsekiri woman is brought back to her family for burial unlike in some cultures where women are interred in her husband’s home is because the Itsekiri believe that she wasn’t sold off to her husband, hence the low bride price.
Besides the bride price, the groom is also required to present other items as gifts for both parents of the bride and these requirements vary from family to family. However, it’s mostly based on the unity of families rather than gifts, bride price, and other goodies that come with Traditional marriage.
Food and drinks
In Itsekiri, as with every party, food and drinks are very central to the entire planning as the bride’s family takes pleasure in hosting their would-be in-laws as well as friends and family. Traditional delicacies such as banga soup and starch, owo soup and starch with boiled yam or unripe plantain on the side and pepper soup make the list of cuisines served along with other more familiar foods like jollof rice, fried rice, egusi or okro soup served with eba or semo.
For drinks, palm wine is served as a special treat.
